8 Considerations needed before the Marriage

 Read Genesis 24. 

While God is sovereign and omniscient, He still desires that we submit to His leadership by praying and asking.  Note in verse 15 that Rebekah was already on the way, but this unnamed servant did not know that, nor see it, until this exact moment. 

The servant waited in silence--observing, discerning.  Finally, he was able to declare in verse 27, "...the LORD has led me in the way..."  This wonderful story demonstrates prayer at work in lives of real people, along with God's guidance, faithfulness, love, and comfort. 

God instituted marriage.  From Genesis 2, it was His design that one man and one woman become partners for life.  The cultural differences and variations in many of our own relationships may be different than this chapter describes, but consider these insights when seeking a life partner.

1. Parental Counsel. (vv.3,49)

Grown children are no longer under the command to obey their parents, but one is never too old to honor them.  One effective way to honor parents is to seek their counsel when making life-changing decisions.

2. Spiritual Unity. (v.3)

2 Corinthians 6:14-"Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers.  For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness?  Or what fellowship has light with darkness?"

Standing before God and witnesses to vow "until death" is the most sacred human contract of all.  Both parties should be fully committed to following Jesus and desiring to grow in their faith.

 3. Prayerful Consideration. (v.12)

It is normal to be anxious about the questions: "Will I ever get married?" or "How will I know if this is the right one?"

Psalm 34:10-"The young lions suffer want and hunger; but those who seek the LORD lack no good thing.

Proverbs 18:22-"He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the LORD."

4. Character Confirmation. (v.14)

Notice the test of Rebekah's spirit.  She possessed a servant’s heart.  Will she do more than expected, without being asked, even for a stranger with 10 large, tired, thirsty camels?  This was the type of woman described in Proverbs 31.

The qualities in a husband are found in Ephesians 5:25-32.  He is to demonstrate self-sacrifice to meet her needs.  A marriage ceremony in itself will not change true character.

5. Physical Attractiveness. (v.16a)

Rebekah was an attractive young woman.  Personal desirability is certainly important.

6. Sexual Purity. (v.16b)

2 Corinthians 7:1-"Since we have these promises, beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from every defilement of body and spirit, bringing holiness to completion in the fear of God."

God can cleanse the impurities of our past and make us holy.  If one has been promiscuous, there needs to be some time of proven faithfulness to the LORD and practice of purity before the marriage.  If immorality is not dealt with before the marriage, it will not change on its own after the marriage ceremony.

7. Family Acceptance. (v.23)

Marriage is a union of two families, not just two individuals.  All personal relationships are affected by the marriage.  Without the families involved extending their blessings, there will always be tension in the relationship and, in some cases, could possibly destroy the marriage.

8. Mutual Completion. (v.67)

Genesis 2:18-"Then the LORD God said, 'It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.'"

A man and a woman are opposites in nearly every way.  This is especially true physically and emotionally.  It is wonderful to have mutual interests but that is not the same as completion.  The marriage partnership is to become together what one could never be by themselves alone.